Lost, and losing.

Fall, and falling.

I guess to fall is to finally land, on whatever surface it may be, and irregardless of the extent of the damage, it is definite you've fallen. The fall is over. But to be falling is to be left hanging. I think losing someone who remains alive haunts more.

I need a closure. Death is an unfortunate, but definite, closure.

You to me are everything.

I would take stars out of the sky for you.

Stop the rain from falling if you asked me to. I'd do anything for you, your wish is my command. I could move a mountain when your hand is in my hand. Words cannot express how much you mean to me. There must be some other way to make you see.

If it takes my heart and soul, you know I'd pay the price. Everything that I possess I'd gladly sacrifice. Oh, you to me are everything, the sweetest song that I could sing. Oh, baby, oh, baby. To you I guess I'm just a clown who picks you up each time you're down.

Oh, baby, oh, baby.

Gone.

Give me strength.

To say all the things I might need to say, to those who won't even turn to look, or even a glance. Not a second, not a moment. I think they, he, she can't really care less. So, give me strength soon, you. Because I need it. I need it now, before my life slips away too. Everything in life is fragile.

I've learnt that all too well.

Fleeting.

It was just yesterday, and a moment later, it's all changed.

He was still there. My arm on his shoulder, his soft breathing against his pillow. He needed sleep, and so we were leaving. His eyes closed, his face peaceful. He didn't open his eyes much, and he almost couldn't recognise me but that didn't matter. He didn't even have the strength to.

Just a moment. And neither did I.

Nothing's gonna change my love for you.

I like it cause his playing makes my heart ache.

And flip.

Food poisoning.

Convulse.

This feeling sucks. To feel your stomach twisting and the gastric hurting. I want to sleep but I can't get any eye shut. I wanna be held in your arms. Want you to hold me to sleep. I feel lousy. And porridge isn't gonna cheer me up.

FML.

Lean on me.

When you're not strong.

And I'll be your friend... Damn. How many so far? Many many. But at least I found some back again. Remember how I told you'll leave behind a big cavity when you're gone? Yeah, dear friend, it still applies. But, I give up.

You don't hurt alone.

心痛啊，心痛！

我真的很对不起。

I've made many mistakes and each time I do, I regret. And with regret comes the unavoidable heartache, the kind that is dull and nagging and only weighs you down more. If I could take it all back, baby, I would. I'm sorry. So do remember that,

当我说我只会为你写华文，那是我真心话。记得吗，宝贝？

Untold.

It's like reading a book, and realising only at the end that the last page's torn out.

Then you're kept in suspense, and it kills you. You wanna know, but you can't. You try to get another copy, from a friend, a relative, but to no avail. You go to the library again and for some reason, that's the only copy. And it leaves you feeling sick, and uneasy. Well, at least pretend it's a good book.

Goddamnit.

Incoherent.

Seriously.

I think you oughtta get a grip, and start acting like a man. You make a deal, you keep to it. You don't leave the other person hanging and waiting, cause that just ain't cool. Just ain't gentlemanly. Especially not if you've kept him/her waiting for long enough now. Not cool, man, not cool.

But what would I expect of you?

Read what you wrote.

Now don't get me wrong.

I may creep you out but I don't really care, done caring about what you might think after i saw those words (which probably weren't even directed at me, were they?). But I wanna let you know that I don't need everything you write about to be about me.

But the fact that I made a disgusting mistake, and committed an awful sin betting on the fact that it was mutual, only to know that everything I thought was isn't, just makes me feel sick. I may have betrayed, but I didn't stab you in the guts.

I'm sorry, babe.

Like a prayer.

When you call my name, it's just like a little prayer. I'm down on knees, wanna take you there.

It's been some time that I've lost sight of my goal, our goal, my eyes straying, my heart flitting. People have been trying to shake me, get me to see what's right before me. And today, when I heard your words, my heart tore and melted, at the same time.

I don't know what's to come, but I hope I'll never hurt you again.

A lost friend.

Is like a coin that has fallen from your purse, rolled across the ground, and into a drain.

You'll probably never see it again. But of course, you'll collect many other coins along the way, some old and rusted, some shinier than you've ever seen, but it'll never be the same. And as you watch that valued coin roll across the ground, maybe chase after it, you know its gonna roll into that drain faster than you can catch it anyway.

And you'll just watch it disappear, for most likely ever.

Just hold me.

While I shiver and cry.

Tell me all will be fine. Even if tomorrow never comes, tell me that you'll always be mine. Because my blood is pulsing through my veins and I know it'll all be over, if not today. If I drop dead and die, baby, I know you'll always be nearby.

Tootch, I'm over. I'm dead.

Wish I could undo it all.

If I could.

I would have set everything right. It's like my studies. If I could, I would go back years and have made sure I had had a habit of studying regularly then. Then I wouldn't be in the shit I am in now. Wish I had seen this coming, wish I hadn't dug my own grave.

Goddamnit. I need to be gone.

The Giant's Causeway.

Oh, I'm in love with nature. (Gotta thank Ms J for the video below)

One more destination to add to my list.

Thank God I wasn't too foolish.

Thank God I didn't fall more in love with every word I withheld. I wasn't even in love to start with.

I've been jumping from the tops of buildings.
For the thrill of the fall.
Ignoring sound advice.
And any thought of consequence.
My bones are shattered.
My pride is shattered.
And in the midst of this self-inflicted pain...

No, I didn't see no beautiful rescue.

Geography calms my soul.

The Giant's Causeway is an amazing wonder.







Pictures by maksimus found on http://www.pixdaus.com/

Mission accomplished for you.

A big fat bad mistake.

It was not supposed to turn out this way. And I wish I had kept my shield up, and not have let any of his words penetrate into my imagination and cause all the damage it has already done. Wish I had seen earlier the person he really was.

Lee Jin Jun no. 2.

Geography takes my breath away.

I never thought I'd say this but,



Geography is amazing.

Definitions.

de·sire [dih-zahyuh r]
-verb (used with object)
1. to wish or long for; crave; want.
2. to express a wish to obtain; ask for; request: The mayor desires your presence at the next meeting.
-noun
3. a longing or craving, as for something that brings satisfaction or enjoyment: a desire for fame.
4. an expressed wish; request.
5. something desired.
6. sexual appetite or a sexual urge.

mis·take [mi-steyk]
-noun
1. an error in action, calculation, opinion, or judgment caused by poor reasoning, carelessness, insufficient knowledge, etc.
2. a misunderstanding or misconception.
-verb (used with object)
3. to regard or identify wrongly as something or someone else: I mistook him for the mayor.
4. to understand, interpret, or evaluate wrongly; misunderstand; misinterpret.
-verb (used without object)
5. to be in error.
-Idiom
6. and no mistake, for certain; surely: He's an honorable person, and no mistake.

a·pol·o·get·ic [uh-pol-uh-jet-ik]
-adjective
1. containing an apology or excuse for a fault, failure, insult, injury, etc.: An apologetic letter to his creditors explained the delay.
2. defending by speech or writing.
3. willing or eager to apologize.
4. sorry; regretful.